Me and much more

I am a 31 year old, single female. I have no desire to find love or have a family....much due to my past but mostly to do with my future. I have no idea who I am or what I want to do. If I knew I probably wouldn't be sitting here, writing this in hopes that I could figure out this thing they call life.

But here I sit on a day off from work, instead of finding the energy to clean my house I write. I love to read, but it just isn't calling to me today and truth be told I would rather write.

It's a rainy day and I feel really calm which is very unlike me. My anger and overwhelming hatred of everything is at bay today! Something that for most of my life has prevented me from having friends, true friends and family. I;m not fake like most, I'm just very opinionated and honest. If I don't like like it then no and I probably like you less for liking something,...even though it is your right to like it. I don't want to argue with you about it, I'm just right.

Not Fair you say. Tough shit....so is life. Look around...do homeless choose to be homeless. I have an uncle who would say yes...get up and get a job. Do the abused choose that life...no. but I have heard people say you can leave. Tell that to the three year old me sitting in my room crying because I didn't do something the right way for my dad. Just a few examples.

Anyway, lately I just feel numb....Gotta find a way back to life.

Anything to help

Anyone to care

Any.......